Valentine's Day: Essentials and Trivialities

By Mujahid Mughal

Since the middle ages, 14th of February is the date when couples (both married and unmarried) claim to express their partners some extra-love which they don’t shower them (perhaps) rest of the year. So they come to restaurants or elsewhere, exchange flowers and other gifts apart from doing other things which they believe are beneficial to their relationships. For me, the matter of concern is that why don’t they express it all year, if it is so.

I don’t know whether Valentine’s Day add some meaning to the relationships or not. But I am of the opinion that if Valentine’s Day somehow brings people closer to each other and strengthens their relationships, then for sure it makes the world a better place. If celebrations like this can reduce the divorce rate, offer women due justice and equality and make marriages more successful than I would suggest, that it should be a legal right of every individual ( if not a fundamental right). Rather, every Individual should be made duty-bound to celebrate it.

In fact, all the nations, throughout the globe, (more specifically, where this culture originated) must declare a public holiday on this day. After all, love matters the most. Love is a basic requirement for any happy family. And families make nations. Happy families therefore would make happier nations. However, whether the celebration of Valentine’s Day brings people closer, in reality, makes marriages and relationships stronger is tenable. You decide.

However, it has been very unpleasant to see the right-wing extremist groups in the Indian sub-continent in the past few years not only criticize vociferously the day but also using violence to prevent its celebration. In India for instance, boys and girls have been beaten by the right-wing extremists many a time, at many places during the past few years. Couples were threatened with enforced marriages if they are caught together on Valentine’s Day. Not only this, even the mainstream political parties did not hesitate to indulge in this non-sense with the “Western culture” rhetoric. It has been called a ‘shameful’ act indeed.

To make it sound further non-sense, some groups said that celebrating this day would encourage teenage pregnancy. However, I am unable to understand how can just one day of co-hanging (Valentine’s Day) increase (or for that matter decrease) the pregnancy (that too after the medical revolution) at an earlier age? How about the co-hangings throughout the year? How about co-education? You decide.

One group also propounded the idea of replacing Valentine's Day with a 'Parent's Worship Day'. Ironically, Asaram Bapu who was charged with child sexual abuse (rape actually) and who is under trial also upheld almost the same views on Valentines Day. Whom to be ashamed of? You decide.

I am astonished at the hypocrisy of these right-wing eastern groups (especially in India, Pakistan and Bangladesh) who are so much opposed to the Western culture. They oppose Western culture by issuing pamphlets, going on radio, TV, internet etc. Do they not know the printing machine, radio, TV, cell-phones, internet are all very much Western inventions? Why don’t they boycott the dish-washer, washing machines, refrigerators, juicers, AC and other machines made by the west? Electricity too is neither Indian nor Pakistani nor a Bangladeshi invention. Even the bulbs and CFLs are also western.

Having shown them this, I must now take them a little away from their kitchens, washrooms and bedrooms. Their forms of government (the democracy), the election system, the judicial system, the police system, administrative systems are all influenced by the West. Not only this, their food, clothing and shelter too are very much Western. If you don’t believe it, then you simply need to make food, clothes and shelter for millions by NOT using any modern technology of the West.

The right-wingers of the sub-continent call it a “shameful act” sometimes, on both cultural and religious grounds. However, it is astonishing that these groups are not ashamed of their corruption (India for instance is among the top 70 corrupt countries of the world). They are also not ashamed of hunger, starvation and subsequent farmer-suicides on a massive scale. I don’t understand why do they become shame-proof when it comes to their rape culture (in India), dowry system, sex-ratio, infanticide killings and communalism or the killings of children (in Pakistan)? Why are they not ashamed of human rights violations and persecutions of minorities in Kashmir and Baluchistan? I fail to understand why are they not ashamed of massive illiteracy and poor health conditions. I again leave it to my esteemed readers to decide what is more shameful- Dalit scholars’ enforced suicide in Hyderabad Central University (India) or the co-hanging of boys and girls on 14^th February?

As mentioned at the outset, I am not here to pass any judgment on whether celebrating Valentine’s day is good or bad or should it be celebrated or not. Celebration (non-celebration or boycotting it) hardly concerns me. You decide if it concerns you. Also, make a decision on whether its celebration should concern you or not and how much?

To me, it rather seems a trivial issue. A non-issue indeed, it seems, when we look at the more serious socio-political and economic troubles (some of which have been mentioned above) Indian sub-continent is going through. To my readers, I ask what according to your religion, culture and conscience requires more priority? You decide.

The author is BSR fellow at the Department of Geography, AMU, Aligarh. Views expressed by the author are personal.